Family Ties - when siblings share high-profile careers

Managing your own high-profile career is difficult enough. But what if a sibling – a sister or brother – also has a high-powered career? It raises a fresh set of challenges – potential conflicts of interests, the prospect of reputational damage from the relation's activities, disparities in wealth, and the notorious sibling rivalry and ego clashes.

It's a situation faced by a number of executives and other high-profile people – the Murdoch children, Lachlan, James, and Elizabeth; former Prime Minister John Howard and his businessman brother Stan; NIB chief executive Mark Fitzgibbon and his brother, former Federal Defence Minister Joel. High-powered families often spawn multiple successes.

Each sibling relationship is unique, but what are the ground rules for high-profile siblings in managing potential conflicts and allowing each other to tap into the many benefits a successful brother or sister can provide?

The Hatzistergos brothers are siblings that have successfully managed this unique situation, and their experience serves as a guide for others. John is the recently retired NSW Attorney-General, highly respected on both sides of politics; elder brother, Nick, is the national chairman of accounting firm William Buck (ranked as the fastest-growing, top-20 firm for 2010 by BRW), and managing director of its large Sydney practice. Nick has also been instrumental in the turnaround of the South Sydney Rabbitohs as a board member of the NRL club.

Despite being widely-known as brothers in business, community and political circles, the pair has not spoken about their relationship, which has thrived throughout their mutual challenges and successes. They say integrity and trust have been the bedrock of their relationship and that they have always remembered they're brothers foremost.

When John Hatzistergos became NSW Health Minister and, then, Attorney-General, his profile rocketed. Nick was constantly asked if he was John's brother. "Lots of people would say, 'We need to ask the obvious question: Is John your brother?' Or, 'Is that politician your brother?' I did get it a lot,” he said.

Once Nick walked into the NRMA to get an international driver's license. "I walked in and a lady was looking at my name and photo. She looked at me, then said, 'Can I ask you a question? Are you …' Nick automatically said: "He's my brother”, assuming she was asking about John. The woman looked confused. "I thought it was you that was a director of Souths,” she said. "I'm sure it was Nick". Nick told her it was in fact him, explaining he was so used to being asked about John.

Nick says he is incredibly proud of his brother, but as other high-profile siblings would attest, his political career came with a downside, with the media constantly asking him to comment on John. "I just refused,” he said. "It wasn't for me to give comment. He's the politician of the family.”

There were also inevitable lobbying approaches. "I was very conscious of John's public profile,” Nick said. "There were always people looking to see if they could pick up titbits. From time to time, I got approached in a business sense, and asked if I could help with this thing or the other, and lobby my brother or other politicians I knew very well. My answer was always 'no'.”

John said he had complete faith in Nick's ability to handle potentially fraught situations like lobbying approaches. "Nick was very conscious of his relationship with me not being used for advancement of other interests,” he said. "If that situation remotely arose he would not, in any way, compromise me.”

The brothers say that values and integrity have underpinned their careers and their relationship. Their parents migrated from Greece in the 1950s and settled in Sydney, where their father worked several jobs as a labourer, and eventually ran a corner store.

John said his father instilled the importance of retaining integrity, early on. "He said it's nothing having lots of money if you can't walk with your head held in the air.” The brothers shared a bedroom for more than 25 years, and Nick, 14 months older, helped teach John, and would walk his baby brother to school.

High-powered careers and the creation of their own families often tear siblings apart. But Nick says, to this day, his parents are a great leveller, helping the brothers to keep their relationship grounded.

"We have a couple of really great parents who, despite their advancing years, are cornerstones,” he said. "We generally meet at Mum's place on a Saturday. There is a little breakfast table and we (along with sister, Poppy) gather around it. That's a leveller. Dad still rules the roost. Mum still runs around telling us not to catch colds; in her eyes we haven't grown much past 16. To my parents we are still their kids.”

Nick says he and John were never competitive with each other. "I guess we always thought it was us against the rest of the world; and John is like my Dad – he never really argues with anyone.” He says if tension does come into a sibling relationship, it's important to keep it level. "He's your brother and you don't care for anybody – apart from other members of the immediate family – more than him. It's a very basic relationship. We shared a room for 25 years. There's nothing we don't know about each other.”

There are, of course, advantages to having a high-profile sibling, being both someone who has an insight into the stresses and strains of successful careers, as well as a trusted sounding board. "I think I have, and John has, confided in each other a lot,” Nick says. He says they understood their discussions were not something to be shared. "When I want to get a perspective, I find the only person I can trust is John,” he adds.

John says his family helped him manage his way through the extremely difficult last years of the dying NSW Labor government. "There were difficult times during the period of the last government that it would require me, from time to time, to have an outlet to allow me to express views and seek opinions within the family about things that were happening.” The family also reinforced his sense of integrity. "The family was very strong on that issue – how I conducted myself and responsibilities I had to see through.”

John says that, ultimately, what has made their relationship work is a good grounding in values and integrity; a sense of what's right and wrong and proper and improper. Nick says the key to managing a high-profile sibling relationship is to remember one thing – that blood is thicker than water. "Long after the dance has stopped and public adulation has stopped, there is that rapport,” he said. "You're still going to be there for each other. John is John and I'm Nick and that's that.”