LAST GASP: Fare go

Last Gasp is a wry take on the week's events, every week.

In order to restore the good name of menus, which sadly bore the brunt of Australia’s puerile political fight this week, this will be an à la carte Last Gasp.

For entree this week we had Uncured Market Volatility marinated in a nikkei miso and served with a side of wilted greenback. This dish is well-suited for the more adventurous, risk-taking palate and is expected to remain on the menu for the foreseeable future.

There was also a very, very light Californian Summit Consommé, which wasn’t as smooth as it appeared and was served with NSA leeks and Chinese cyber croutons (to ensure every last ‘bit’ was soaked up).

For mains, there was an old time favourite, European-Baked Greek Lambs, served with some tangy protesting olives and riot police anchovies.

Alternatively, for those wishing to try some regional fare, there was Smoked Suncorp Flounder, with the bad bank bones removed – a lighter, more tastier alternative to last season’s plain Suncorp croaker.

For dessert, we had a Consumer Sentiment Soufflé, which may only stay inflated for a brief time, as well as a Housing Finance Friand that admittedly looked better than it tasted.

For coffee, there was a flat unemployment rate or, for the more discerning, a bitter participation rate.

Finally, it should go without saying, all Australian diners were treated to the usual assortment of political nuts.

Bon appetit.